Here is goes. I've been wanting to start a journal for a long time. I want to do this for my kids and also for myself. I feel like it is a prompting from my Heavenly Father. At this point in my life I think I have given Heavenly Father a back seat. Not that I don't always try and it's not that I always think about what He would want me to do but when given a choice between say, home teaching or a calling and staying home or working I'll chose the latter. Life just seems too busy to squeeze it all in. I've called this blog/journal "Bryan's Experimental Life" because that is what He has asked us to do. He wants us to test everything out. He wants us to experiment with His word and see what happens. So here is goes, Day 1, Just like 5-6 years ago when I started running to lose weight I am spiritually running to lose my spiritual fat.

It is the end of the work day but when is a bad time to start?

Current focus....focus's...foci? haha, not really sure what the proper term is but I have a lot of areas that need improvement:

Spiritual:
Reading scriptures (1 chapter a day)
Saying morning and evening prayer
No swearing (I have a potty mouth at work)
Home teaching

Goals I hope to achieve by putting God first:

1. Kathryn will be happier (If Kathryn is upset it is impossible for me to be happy)
2. Happier every day...less depression (I go through strong depression dips often)
3. Qualify for the Boston marathon with a 3:05 time...ya, it's really hard. My PR is 3:13
4. Get more healthy. Get weight to 169 lbs. 
5. Better at my job. More focus, less mistakes

This isn't fancy and I'm not even going to read over it before I publish it. I just want to get off my pure emotions and feelings and go from there. Right now I have a strong testimony but feel doubt. I can't deny some things that have happened but death and thinking about nothing but blackness after we die scares me. I want to KNOW it is all true and up until now I haven't really taken the leap of faith and changed my life enough to earn that if it is true. I feel like I am getting that call to step up. I want to serve in the church. I want to help. I would love to be a mission president, I think that would be soooo fun but I am not even close to good enough right now. I want D&R to do so well that I can not work so much so I have more time for everything else and still make enough money to live where I live and have enough to help others and retire early to serve the Lord full time. I don't have the answers and I keep thinking I can do it on my own but if everything I have been taught and everything I feel is real I am not doing it right. I am not putting God first and letting Him direct my path. So here it goes.